Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
