My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
