I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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