So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
