I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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