How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I feel like abortions should bother me more
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
