remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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