I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
