I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
do herpes really smell.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I have tasted many bathrooms
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize