i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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