I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
