Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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