Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
