don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
