Its about making memories worth repressing
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize