I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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