brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
