Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
