Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
