I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
