I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
