there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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