and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
