sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
