Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Randomize
