she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
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