So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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