why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
