They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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