I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
