I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
