i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
