What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
