I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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