I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
