I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
