Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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