I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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