are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
