at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
