So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
