Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
