he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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