singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
