marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
