Will you blow on my dice?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize