she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
