Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just made out with a guy for $7.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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