Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize