haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
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